I was walking on the sidewalk today right after class (my class is on the third floor), and I realized that it seems like this unspoken code that people going down walk on the right side of the stairwell while people going up go on the left. And, on the sidewalk, everybody sticks to their right side, whether they're coming or going. It's intriguing. Makes me wonder if it's the opposite in Europe, where cars drive on the opposite sides of the road.
Isn't it weird how unspoken codes seem to be everywhere? You just seem to instinctively know it, or you learned it from society. Even though there's a WHOLE OTHER SIDE of the stairwell, people tend to stick to the right. It's just for courtesy issues, I know. If there was a flaming fire at the top of the building, nobody would care and would trample down the stairs like a wild stampede. Isn't it strange, though? It would make people feel a little uncomfortable or think you're rude if you broke the code by just walking on the other side and bumping into the people going up. I do that sometimes, I must admit. I mean, it's a whole other side! But what other courtesy issues are there that we know but don't speak of? Just think about it.
Also. NSYNC. Oh my gosh. I don't think NSYNC will ever get old for me. That's what I grew up with. While people listened to New Kids on the Block or the Backstreet Boys, I was intensely in love with NSYNC. Even to this day I still have most of the lyrics of ALL their songs memorized. I can even remember that the first song I had ever memorized (besides Sunday school songs, of course) was an NSYNC song. I still love them though. I love their voices, and their harmony, and their a capella is beautiful (better yet, it's to DIE for). I've never heard any band sing a capella better!
Wednesday, 29 September 2010
Wednesday, 22 September 2010
My Memories
I found a journal yesterday. I really have nothing to do so I'm going to post my life story RIGHT HERE. Just kidding. I worked on the outline for my essay and I'm just going to actually write it later. But anyway, my journal was so funny. I'd written it online in my notepad on yahoo mail from 2006-2008, so pretty much from 8th grade to 10th grade. And some of the things I'd written were so funny. I mean, high school was a huge time of confusion for me, especially during those years, and I'd written about all my crushes, all the boys that I thought I was crushing on, all the celebrities and boy bands that I loved (can you believe I liked the Jonas Brothers at one point? God help me!). It was so fun to read! But yeah, though it was funny, it brought back memories. I can hardly believe that it was only four years ago! I remember writing it because I thought, just in case my handwritten journals are burnt in a fire or something and I die, I'll keep an online account of it in my mail. Of course, that would only work if somebody broke into my email account haha.
But still! My little eighth grade mind believed in it so I guess I will too. I love finding journals! It's like opening up a part of your past with your memories. I wrote a lot about church people and school crushes. Not too much about school friends. I complained a lot too haha. And the journal was just so long I couldn't even read it all. The posts I did find were funny though. I was so passionate about whom I loved and hated hahaha. What an adorable dork I was.
Yes, well, that was the extent of my day. Journals and classes. And my new rekindled passion for James Dean and James Stewart. I'm just into the James's I suppose haha. Well, it's time for me to go! Go back to the present. It's so hard for me sometimes. I get so caught in my past, the present starts moving on without me and I have to catch up. Memories are my favorite. Well anyway, I'm going to get into my music and hopefully not take another nap!
Gratification comes in the doing, not in the result. -James Dean.
But still! My little eighth grade mind believed in it so I guess I will too. I love finding journals! It's like opening up a part of your past with your memories. I wrote a lot about church people and school crushes. Not too much about school friends. I complained a lot too haha. And the journal was just so long I couldn't even read it all. The posts I did find were funny though. I was so passionate about whom I loved and hated hahaha. What an adorable dork I was.
Yes, well, that was the extent of my day. Journals and classes. And my new rekindled passion for James Dean and James Stewart. I'm just into the James's I suppose haha. Well, it's time for me to go! Go back to the present. It's so hard for me sometimes. I get so caught in my past, the present starts moving on without me and I have to catch up. Memories are my favorite. Well anyway, I'm going to get into my music and hopefully not take another nap!
Gratification comes in the doing, not in the result. -James Dean.
Monday, 20 September 2010
Things I Like About College
1. You can stay up as late as you want without worrying about being caught.
2. You can do whatever you want whenever you want. You just have to be cautious of strangers.
3. You get to be away from parents!
4. You don't have people nagging you (unless you have friends that nag you...), and if you don't want to talk to parents, just don't answer their calls! I never do this though, by the way. :]
5. You get independence without actually having to worry about paying for rent and stuff like that. In my case, anyway.
6. You can EAT whenever and whatever you want! What a luxury!
7. Everything's pretty much nearby so you can work out, study in the library, read in your room, sleep in your bed, etc. whenever, and it's all in walking distance!
8. The teachers are pretty chill (some of them) and let you out really early if they don't have anything else to say.
9. You get to pick and choose which classes you want, just as long as you pick ones that'll fulfill the minimum class requirements. But after that, you can take whatever classes you want!
10. You have to take care of yourself and you don't have to worry about what your parents would say. I love my independence right now.
2. You can do whatever you want whenever you want. You just have to be cautious of strangers.
3. You get to be away from parents!
4. You don't have people nagging you (unless you have friends that nag you...), and if you don't want to talk to parents, just don't answer their calls! I never do this though, by the way. :]
5. You get independence without actually having to worry about paying for rent and stuff like that. In my case, anyway.
6. You can EAT whenever and whatever you want! What a luxury!
7. Everything's pretty much nearby so you can work out, study in the library, read in your room, sleep in your bed, etc. whenever, and it's all in walking distance!
8. The teachers are pretty chill (some of them) and let you out really early if they don't have anything else to say.
9. You get to pick and choose which classes you want, just as long as you pick ones that'll fulfill the minimum class requirements. But after that, you can take whatever classes you want!
10. You have to take care of yourself and you don't have to worry about what your parents would say. I love my independence right now.
Saturday, 18 September 2010
The Night Before
So yesterday I got invited to this party where you party all night and then go and watch the sunrise. It's apparently supposed to be the first party of the whole school year thrown by this one frat, but it's more like the fourth party haha. But anyway, so I got invited, and it started at 10:30 p.m. I had loads of time to kill.
I went to my room and just relaxed. Played video games, lied on my bed, did nothing, and around 8:30 my roomie said we should work out, which we did for half an hour. Intense, huh? I'm so out of shape!
Yeah, anyway, then we got back, showered, and I played some video games and then went upstairs to talk to my friends. It was cool. Then at around eleven we started heading for the party. And it sounded REALLY loud. Then, we got distracted by my friend who wanted to go pick up her other friend, who was at this other frat. So we go and then, no party for us, just a social thing. With frat boys. And if frat boys aren't known for their drinking and smoking, I don't know what they're known for.
So yeah, I went to my first college social, not party. And I think my lungs are filled up with second-hand smoke (don't worry, I didn't actually smoke). It was pretty funny listening to everyone's conversations and hanging out with people I didn't know too well. It's funny, too, that they're somewhat studious too. They get baked, go party, drink a keg or two, and then get up early the next morning to do work and stuff. Haha! College life, man. Whew.
Yeaah, I just decided to record some stuff down. I'm pretty tired. And hungry. So I guess I should find something to eat...oh shoot, and yesterday, there was the freaking biggest thunderstorm ever. It was so loud!! It woke me up at around nine, just blasting away and setting off car alarms. Funny, but freakin' loud. Forget about the trains! Oh yes, and right after all the thunder ended, a train went by. Forget sleep! Geez.
But yes. Life as a college student is quite interesting as of now.
I went to my room and just relaxed. Played video games, lied on my bed, did nothing, and around 8:30 my roomie said we should work out, which we did for half an hour. Intense, huh? I'm so out of shape!
Yeah, anyway, then we got back, showered, and I played some video games and then went upstairs to talk to my friends. It was cool. Then at around eleven we started heading for the party. And it sounded REALLY loud. Then, we got distracted by my friend who wanted to go pick up her other friend, who was at this other frat. So we go and then, no party for us, just a social thing. With frat boys. And if frat boys aren't known for their drinking and smoking, I don't know what they're known for.
So yeah, I went to my first college social, not party. And I think my lungs are filled up with second-hand smoke (don't worry, I didn't actually smoke). It was pretty funny listening to everyone's conversations and hanging out with people I didn't know too well. It's funny, too, that they're somewhat studious too. They get baked, go party, drink a keg or two, and then get up early the next morning to do work and stuff. Haha! College life, man. Whew.
Yeaah, I just decided to record some stuff down. I'm pretty tired. And hungry. So I guess I should find something to eat...oh shoot, and yesterday, there was the freaking biggest thunderstorm ever. It was so loud!! It woke me up at around nine, just blasting away and setting off car alarms. Funny, but freakin' loud. Forget about the trains! Oh yes, and right after all the thunder ended, a train went by. Forget sleep! Geez.
But yes. Life as a college student is quite interesting as of now.
Friday, 10 September 2010
Classes have started!
Okay, so I've been trying to update my blog when I can (which is almost all the time for now) and it's been a pretty nice Friday. I attended my classes (only two were today), and getting up early made me soooo tired. And I didn't have time to grab breakfast before so I was really hungry too. I think freshmen preceptorial is gonna be pretty interesting, though I'm going to have to have discussions, which I am not a total fan of. :/
So I'll tell you the rest of my day. I went to freshmen preceptorial at 8 in the morning (so early!) and had class for 45 minutes (today was a shortened day) and then went and had breakfast with my friend where I saw this guy from my class that I recognized eating by himself (cool college kids can do that, you know :] ) and when he was done he put his plate and stuff away and then came back and cleaned his place and pushed his chair in and everything and then left and it looked like he'd never sat there. I love polite people like that! :]
Anyway, and then I went to my room because I had nothing to do for another 45 minutes and, after buying my books online, I went to my next class, into to film. That was quite interesting. My teacher cussed a bit (her name's Emily too) and she seemed like an...interesting teacher. It's cool though, because we'll be movie critics and watching a movie every week. I love it already.
After film class, I went and signed up for my payroll. I'm glad I got my to-do list out of the way. I was so tired, so even though there was this opening convocation going on at 11, I went back to my room, played a little on the computer, and then just slept till two. It was a really nice nap. Then I got up and all, and now I'm doing what I've been doing! Writing! :]
I feel pretty tired nowadays. I don't even know why. Oh yeah! I got a job too, as a computer lab assistant. I'm going to have to learn how to use computers now...especially macs. It'll be an okay job, I think, though I make practically nothing. :[ But at least it's a four-year job as long as I don't mess up, so that makes me happy at least.
But yeah, that was the extent of my day. The most exciting part, anyway. Actually, the next most exciting part is going to be at 4 when I go to CARNIVAL OF CLUBS! Actually called Club Rush in California. Knox just makes it sound cooler, haha. Makes me think there's going to be a ferris wheel or something...I wish!
Anyway, I should get started on my reading. Homework time. :P Ugh. But I will make the most of it! Ah! I'll try, anyway!
So I'll tell you the rest of my day. I went to freshmen preceptorial at 8 in the morning (so early!) and had class for 45 minutes (today was a shortened day) and then went and had breakfast with my friend where I saw this guy from my class that I recognized eating by himself (cool college kids can do that, you know :] ) and when he was done he put his plate and stuff away and then came back and cleaned his place and pushed his chair in and everything and then left and it looked like he'd never sat there. I love polite people like that! :]
Anyway, and then I went to my room because I had nothing to do for another 45 minutes and, after buying my books online, I went to my next class, into to film. That was quite interesting. My teacher cussed a bit (her name's Emily too) and she seemed like an...interesting teacher. It's cool though, because we'll be movie critics and watching a movie every week. I love it already.
After film class, I went and signed up for my payroll. I'm glad I got my to-do list out of the way. I was so tired, so even though there was this opening convocation going on at 11, I went back to my room, played a little on the computer, and then just slept till two. It was a really nice nap. Then I got up and all, and now I'm doing what I've been doing! Writing! :]
I feel pretty tired nowadays. I don't even know why. Oh yeah! I got a job too, as a computer lab assistant. I'm going to have to learn how to use computers now...especially macs. It'll be an okay job, I think, though I make practically nothing. :[ But at least it's a four-year job as long as I don't mess up, so that makes me happy at least.
But yeah, that was the extent of my day. The most exciting part, anyway. Actually, the next most exciting part is going to be at 4 when I go to CARNIVAL OF CLUBS! Actually called Club Rush in California. Knox just makes it sound cooler, haha. Makes me think there's going to be a ferris wheel or something...I wish!
Anyway, I should get started on my reading. Homework time. :P Ugh. But I will make the most of it! Ah! I'll try, anyway!
Monday, 6 September 2010
College!
Hey! So I haven't posted in like, a week or two, but it's been quite busy here in Illinois. Yes, I am finally in college! Classes haven't started yet, but already, in the three days I've been here, I see the difference between high school and college. First of all, people are old enough here to do things like party, and smoke, and drink, and stuff like that. So I find beer cans randomly, or see people smoking. Yeah. Egh.
The people here at Knox are also pretty nice. I got my roomie, who's also pretty freakin awesome!!!!, but I see a lot of differences in our views. Hopefully, if we don't bring them up, we'll get along just fine.
The campus here is beautiful. And it's also pretty small so I can find everything pretty easily. Sometimes. I like it here because there's a bunch of people I can relate to, and living away from parents is always a plus. Also I don't feel too strange going up to people and introducing myself randomly. In high school, that was something that labeled you as a kinda weird kid. And also, everyone here looks pretty much the same age.
I feel a little dirty sometimes, though, because people so openly talk about gay people and transvestites and stuff (I know, I'm like in the 90's or something. It's a hush hush topic) and so many of the people I know support them, which makes me feel uncomfortable. What also makes me feel uncomfortable is that I know a bunch of people here now that smoke weed a lot (which is probably not unusual on college campuses. Obviously it's unusual to me).
Well anyway, I'm pretty tired. I get tired early nowadays. Must be all the weed I smoke and the alcohol I drink. You know. (Totally not). But yeah, time to hit the sack. Ooh, I forgot to write about Sex Signals today! There was a little comedy thing that talked about sexual harrassment, rape, and signals people might give if they want to have sex. I've never heard the word "sex" used so much. Ha.
Yeah, that was pretty much the extent of my day. Did what I had to. I'm going to find out my classes tomorrow, and that's going to be fun. Well, sayanara for now (did I even spell that right?). Don't look forward to me coming home with a boyfriend any time soon. May not happen for the next four years, actually. xP Yech.
P.S.
Did I tell the trains are so freaking loud that I'm going to kill a train conducter if I see one one day?! Do they really, really need a huge freaking loud horn to tell the whole WORLD that they're coming?! Goodness freaking gracious!
The people here at Knox are also pretty nice. I got my roomie, who's also pretty freakin awesome!!!!, but I see a lot of differences in our views. Hopefully, if we don't bring them up, we'll get along just fine.
The campus here is beautiful. And it's also pretty small so I can find everything pretty easily. Sometimes. I like it here because there's a bunch of people I can relate to, and living away from parents is always a plus. Also I don't feel too strange going up to people and introducing myself randomly. In high school, that was something that labeled you as a kinda weird kid. And also, everyone here looks pretty much the same age.
I feel a little dirty sometimes, though, because people so openly talk about gay people and transvestites and stuff (I know, I'm like in the 90's or something. It's a hush hush topic) and so many of the people I know support them, which makes me feel uncomfortable. What also makes me feel uncomfortable is that I know a bunch of people here now that smoke weed a lot (which is probably not unusual on college campuses. Obviously it's unusual to me).
Well anyway, I'm pretty tired. I get tired early nowadays. Must be all the weed I smoke and the alcohol I drink. You know. (Totally not). But yeah, time to hit the sack. Ooh, I forgot to write about Sex Signals today! There was a little comedy thing that talked about sexual harrassment, rape, and signals people might give if they want to have sex. I've never heard the word "sex" used so much. Ha.
Yeah, that was pretty much the extent of my day. Did what I had to. I'm going to find out my classes tomorrow, and that's going to be fun. Well, sayanara for now (did I even spell that right?). Don't look forward to me coming home with a boyfriend any time soon. May not happen for the next four years, actually. xP Yech.
P.S.
Did I tell the trains are so freaking loud that I'm going to kill a train conducter if I see one one day?! Do they really, really need a huge freaking loud horn to tell the whole WORLD that they're coming?! Goodness freaking gracious!
Wednesday, 1 September 2010
Yeah!
Today, out of extreme boredom in the very early morning (8 a.m.) where I had absolutely nothing to do, I revisited my xanga, the blog that all kids had in junior high at my age. And I can't believe I was such a dork! Hahaha! I wrote a lot too about my days and stuff. Pretty interesting. I was a swimmer, had a major crush on some guy I never even talked to again after freshmen year, had no drama, and, seemingly, no real problems. Haha, well, look at me now. All mature and stuff. Yeah right. xD
It's funny looking at those blogs that I wrote in eighth grade and freshmen year, and I think to myself, dang, it's already been 4 years since I've done that. And I've changed so much! i used 2 write like this, not much diff, but actually alot when you come 2 think abt it. :] so many acronyms and stuff. who didnt write like this tho, rite? teehee
Yeah, but anyway, that stuff makes me feel all grown-up, and it shows me how I've changed. Funny, hm? I'm quite glad I changed a lot, or else I would've been doomed to be a dork all my life...though that seems to be inevitable anyway. -.-
I feel like an only child with all my sisters gone! They're all at school, and one of my younger younger sisters woke me up when she was getting ready for school. At seven something! I was dead. I guess it's good practice for when I start classes in college. But now I'm awake and pretty bored. So...that's why I was looking at my xanga and myspace and stuff, haha. Stuff I probably won't look at again for awhile. Yay, Facebook! :] I wonder why they never made a movie on myspace or blogs...hmm.
Well, my eyes are extremely puffy right now from crying like a baby yesterday over nothing. Yeah, I admit it, I cry. I'm not sure why I started but I started thinking about stuff and it just made me cry. And I'm not talking about sentimental stuff. Just about my dad. I don't like talking about him to people much because he's a pastor and all and I don't want to give him a bad rep, or make my friends think that all pastors are like that at home, but he's kind of, you know, critical and not very affectionate to his kids. He got upset yesterday because he had to pick up my sister from school and drop her off at swimming. Like, what the heck? Can't even do that? And he was like, I have a schedule, you need to tell me beforehand. Well, kids and their schedules are unpredictable in itself. You just gotta get used to it. And I think I was all weepy because I feel like he never really tried to get to know me, and now I'm leaving and my dad knows nothing about me. He knows how I was at nine, ten years old. And thats it. To tell you the truth, I've been avoiding him at home because just talking to him makes me nervous. Should a kid really be that afraid of her father? I just feel...blah, I don't know. This is weird that I'm writing this on a blog. I suppose no one really reads this anyway, so it doesn't matter.
Anyway, I'm just ranting about nothing. I really shouldn't be saying this stuff, but sometimes it's hard to keep burying the bad feelings I have towards my dad. Every time he lectures me, I've taken a habit to start weeping like a wimpy kid, which I sort of am when it comes to my dad. I know why, I guess, but it makes me feel like a little kid admitting to it. But, I guess I never stopped acting like a little kid to him. I guess that's why I'm so hard and callused and all sarcastic to people. I could be the nicest person, but I could also be quite mean to people too if I don't like them or resepct them, and sometimes I see instances where I'm just like my dad. It's funny because I always feel like I have to be the "tough guy" in my family, being the oldest and because there's no one else, really. It gets tiring sometimes, to be responsible all the time, and I guess that's why I want to get away so bad. It's formed my good attributes, though, like being responsible, being punctual; stuff like that.
This feeling is just something to get over, I suppose. My only regret, now that I'm leaving, is that I never really got to build a relationship with my dad. I guess that might be partly my fault, but it's too late now.
Haha, wow, this blog was full of blah blah blah. Lots of random thoughts popping up and about. Yeah, I feel better after writing this, though. It's the Eldest Princess all over again. Can't wait to get away. New life, new love, new interests, new friends, but never a new family. So I have to make do with what I got! Yeah!
It's funny looking at those blogs that I wrote in eighth grade and freshmen year, and I think to myself, dang, it's already been 4 years since I've done that. And I've changed so much! i used 2 write like this, not much diff, but actually alot when you come 2 think abt it. :] so many acronyms and stuff. who didnt write like this tho, rite? teehee
Yeah, but anyway, that stuff makes me feel all grown-up, and it shows me how I've changed. Funny, hm? I'm quite glad I changed a lot, or else I would've been doomed to be a dork all my life...though that seems to be inevitable anyway. -.-
I feel like an only child with all my sisters gone! They're all at school, and one of my younger younger sisters woke me up when she was getting ready for school. At seven something! I was dead. I guess it's good practice for when I start classes in college. But now I'm awake and pretty bored. So...that's why I was looking at my xanga and myspace and stuff, haha. Stuff I probably won't look at again for awhile. Yay, Facebook! :] I wonder why they never made a movie on myspace or blogs...hmm.
Well, my eyes are extremely puffy right now from crying like a baby yesterday over nothing. Yeah, I admit it, I cry. I'm not sure why I started but I started thinking about stuff and it just made me cry. And I'm not talking about sentimental stuff. Just about my dad. I don't like talking about him to people much because he's a pastor and all and I don't want to give him a bad rep, or make my friends think that all pastors are like that at home, but he's kind of, you know, critical and not very affectionate to his kids. He got upset yesterday because he had to pick up my sister from school and drop her off at swimming. Like, what the heck? Can't even do that? And he was like, I have a schedule, you need to tell me beforehand. Well, kids and their schedules are unpredictable in itself. You just gotta get used to it. And I think I was all weepy because I feel like he never really tried to get to know me, and now I'm leaving and my dad knows nothing about me. He knows how I was at nine, ten years old. And thats it. To tell you the truth, I've been avoiding him at home because just talking to him makes me nervous. Should a kid really be that afraid of her father? I just feel...blah, I don't know. This is weird that I'm writing this on a blog. I suppose no one really reads this anyway, so it doesn't matter.
Anyway, I'm just ranting about nothing. I really shouldn't be saying this stuff, but sometimes it's hard to keep burying the bad feelings I have towards my dad. Every time he lectures me, I've taken a habit to start weeping like a wimpy kid, which I sort of am when it comes to my dad. I know why, I guess, but it makes me feel like a little kid admitting to it. But, I guess I never stopped acting like a little kid to him. I guess that's why I'm so hard and callused and all sarcastic to people. I could be the nicest person, but I could also be quite mean to people too if I don't like them or resepct them, and sometimes I see instances where I'm just like my dad. It's funny because I always feel like I have to be the "tough guy" in my family, being the oldest and because there's no one else, really. It gets tiring sometimes, to be responsible all the time, and I guess that's why I want to get away so bad. It's formed my good attributes, though, like being responsible, being punctual; stuff like that.
This feeling is just something to get over, I suppose. My only regret, now that I'm leaving, is that I never really got to build a relationship with my dad. I guess that might be partly my fault, but it's too late now.
Haha, wow, this blog was full of blah blah blah. Lots of random thoughts popping up and about. Yeah, I feel better after writing this, though. It's the Eldest Princess all over again. Can't wait to get away. New life, new love, new interests, new friends, but never a new family. So I have to make do with what I got! Yeah!
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