I Wish

You know that feeling when you want something so badly it actually, physically hurts? I think I've experienced that a lot recently.

I'm sure everyone wants something that badly at least once or twice in their life. If not, then seriously, you must get everything on a silver platter. Or you just don't want anything... The thing I want most right now is to get out of here. I'm tired of living like this, in comfort and so sheltered all the time. It's boring here, I'm tired of the sun (please rain, come back!) and I want to go away so badly it's hurting me. Ugh. I want adventure! People say that I'm going to get homesick really fast and that the other places aren't as good or are all just the same, but I want to see for myself! I want to travel, to study in England (which is one of my dreams!), explore new cultures, see new things, experience new places, etc. And it's not even good enough to go visit. I want to LIVE there. Hence, the studying in England. For a YEAR! That would be so amazing!

Anyway, if life keeps going at such a slow pace for me, I think I may bust. Internally, of course, so no worries to anyone about cleaning up a mess. That just gave me a pretty nasty mental picture.

So anyway, yeah, going out with friends and applying for colleges made that want rise up again in my chest and now I want it so bad I'm stressing myself out. Need to relieve stress!! I stand corrected from yesterday. I may get a heart attack and die any minute now.


Song of the Day: Sailing - Christopher Cross

Poem of the Day:
Travel - Edna St. Vincent Millay

The railroad track is miles away,
And the day is loud with voices speaking,
Yet there isn't a train goes by all day
But I hear its whistle shrieking.

All night there isn't a train goes by,
Though the night is still for sleep and dreaming,
But I see its cinders red on the sky,
And hear its engine steaming.

My heart is warm with friends I make,
And better friends I'll not be knowing;
Yet there isn't a train I'd rather take,
No matter where it's going.